Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Don't Blame Me...

We are SO hosed.

That is all.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Dad Gummit

So my church generally has a Christmas thing called Journey to Bethlehem... The practices are starting up soon. I can tell that Journey season has come not because it's getting colder or that the director of the indoor segment has sent out the cast list and schedule... 

It's that I have the almost unstoppable urge to say "Shalom!" to Every. Single. Person. That. I. Meet. 

I mean, for Pete's sake, you'd think it would be such a habit by now, but every year around this time I want to start shouting random Jewish expressions... Shalom included. Now, really, I don't say it the rest of the year. 

Just thought I'd say that. 

Right, now that I've gotten some of the more useless stuff out of the way, it's time for me to spread my whiny 17-year-old fury all over the blogosphere! YAY! 

So I'll be turning 18 in a matter of days, meaning I just eke in under the deadline for registration to vote in the general election next month. The very thought is infuriating, seeing as both McCain and Obama are one big huge crap sandwich. Way to blow my first election. 

Honestly, there's a reason I'm a teensy bit misanthropic. People like THAT. 

I'm not going to go on and on about how much one or the other sucks, or how both candidates suck, and I'm also not going to "Make my voice heard!" because honestly? I got nuthin'. Most teenagers have got nuthin'. A bunch of college students want to "Make Our Voices HEARD!!" But they don't have anything worthwhile to offer. I don't want to hear your voice unless you have something intelligent to say, ya tardbox. 

So I'll have to stick with shutting up, holding my nose, and voting for the lesser of the two major evils. 

Bugger. I think I'll live in a cave somewhere. Hermits United meets every ten years; should be fun. 

Current Mood: Cynical

Random Useless Fact of the Day: Hwell DUH! Everyone knows that "reality tv" isn't all that reflective of reality. Example? The main man in Fox's 2003 series "Joe Millionaire" was touted as a $19,000 construction worker actually worked as an underwear model more than once and appeared in the soap opera "Days of Our Lives." A little bit of extra change, there, eh?

Sunday, September 14, 2008

It Feels Good to be a Gangsta

...Actually, I wouldn't really know what that's like anyway. I'm too gosh-darn white to be gangsta. Seriously, I'm translucent. *holds up arm* And I bruise easily. 

Nope. I am no gangsta. 

Unfortunately, it seems that a bunch of folks here in the 'burbs think they're pretty gangster. I feel it's my duty as a productive member of society to say this: 

PULL YOUR BLOODY PANTS UP. 

GAWD. 

I DO NOT WANT TO SEE THE EXACT TOPOGRAPHY OF YOUR BEHIND. 

When I see guys running around with their back pockets around their knees, it makes me want to grab the nearest roll of duct tape (staple guns are even better) and cinch up said pants around their armpits. Maybe I should start stuffing two or three of their friends in there, too, seeing as there's enough room for at least two people in there. 

While we're at it, stop trying to graffiti the transformers. I can tell you're just using one of those extra-large "Sharpies" and not making any real effort. You fail. 

Oh, and one more thing: For the love of all that is good and holy, stop trying to act like the bandanna on your head and hanging one arm out the car window makes you cool. It doesn't. It makes you look like a douchebag. I could most likely kick your butt to the moon in a fight. You fail even more. 

Sincerely, 

The One Chick That Is Going To Be Making More Money Than You

Mood: Oddly satisfied

Random Useless Fact of the Day: Gig Young, an Academy-Award-wining actor, was originally cast as Charlie in "Charlie's Angels." Unfortunately, Young was also an ardent alcoholic, and showed up to work on the first day so drunk that the producers had no choice but to fire him. Hence John Forsythe came onto the scene in a last-minute hiring decision. The Day Was Saved!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

*kicking and screaming*

All right, all RIGHT!!! FINALLY.

Geez. People keep buggin' me.

So.

Blogging. This newfangled thing.

First off, an update: I got my black belt back in February (what?), got into my first car wreck in April (what?) --Don't worry, the car is fixed and in perfect working condition-- and I am about two weeks out of entering my senior year of high school (WHAT?!). I've taken up the bass guitar, which is coming along swimmingly-- I love the thing.

Next off, a plug: Doctor Who. One of my friends recently introduced me to this lovely bit of British sci-fi, and I've gone and gotten completely addicted. It's really a very fun TV show. I mean, how many other shows have decent writing (one writer constantly makes me almost pee myself with fright), unusual plotlines (including dropping various people and about a zillion angry nemeses into separate parallel universes), attractive leading men (David Tennant. Scottish. I need not say more.), AND nerdy gadgetry into 40 minutes of... stuff? It's hilarious. If you don't watch the show, then at least watch me and my friends watch the show. Sometimes that can be more entertaining than the show itself. (No, I'm not kidding.) I've gotten myself so incredibly brainwashed that I'm currently teaching myself the bassline to the original 1960's theme music.

On a completely different note: the ACT. I hate that test. I took it a few weeks ago, and am exceedingly glad that I've gotten it done. I managed a 29, with high scores in reading and English. Science was okay, not really so much the math. But since everything I plan to do involves using a calculator and a lot of scratch paper, I think I'll be okay. I don't think I'll be needing to graph matrices and sine curves while closing business accounts, do you?

Yeah. Didn't think so.

Once again, a non sequitur: Video games. My mom managed to buy a Wii off of one of the college students, so when I feel like it I pop in Smash Bro's Brawl and start Beating the Ever Loving Tar out of various Nintendo characters. It's great fun. I plan on acquiring MarioKart eventually, but perhaps with an easier controller than the Wii wheel. (Tried it. Not such great results... I prefer a GameCube controller.) I also went and blew quite a few moneys on a Nintendo DS (Yes, I am a Nintendo fangirl. Shut up.), which has proven to be quite a riot. Lego Indiana Jones is quite the Good Time when I'm bored.

Up, down, looping around to: Roller coasters. My lawd. I almost died when the church youth group went to Six Flags. Seriously, I have a Deathly Fear of roller coasters. I don't even like driving over hills that fast, ok? That's how much I despise the feeling of g-forces on my gut. But of course, a couple of my guy friends decide to put me on the most extreme rides the park has to offer. You should've seen me hyperventilate on the Mr. Freeze. I was shouting obscenities by the time that one was finished.

Guh. The fear is a little less deathly, but I still hate hate hate HAAAAAATE the feeling of g-forces. They are officially Not Cool.

Last one, I promise! It's the most important (aside from events that I'm not allowed to crow about... yet): We gonna have us a weddin'! Yes, my big sister finally found herself a man that can keep up with her biting sarcasm. Well done, B.J., for surviving this long! (Especially the vote.) But at least we know that he can take public humiliation. When Amy told me about the wedding plans, it was a little hard, I admit, to absorb at first. At first, I was simply "buh?" which quickly progressed to "OMGWTF?!" which eventually morphed into "Ok, cool. The Force is back in balance. Carry on." But I'm happy for them. The two tend to be so lovey-dovey it's sickening.

As, perhaps, it should be.

Current Mood: Exhausted

Random Useless Fact of the Day: The original version of "The Sleeping Beauty" was most likely not something that you'd read to your innocent little girl. In Charles Perrault's original version, the sleeping girl wasn't awakened by her handsome prince's kiss, but the nudging of her unborn twins. Yup, that's right, the still-married Casanova violated a comatose chick and THEN took her home, where his first wife tried to have her killed. ...Dang. Disney must've had a field day.

Friday, February 01, 2008

Score.

At last, after two and a half years, I finally got my letter. Which one?

The one saying I'm confirmed for black belt testing come February 16th. WIN.

You missed the show. I got home from black belt club last week, and checked the mail since I was pretty sure that no one else had gotten to yet. I grabbed the wad of envelopes and started flicking through it, doing the usual "Not mine... not mine... not mine..." before I can to a really thick one. "Heeeeeey, this could be interesting." Sure enough, it was my name on said envelope, causing a shiver down my spine and my legs to bolt as fast as they could go down my driveway into my house. I dropped my gym bag rather unceremoniously on the floor and tore into the envelope, shouting "HOLY CRAP, MOM, IT'S HERE!!!" And, lo and behold, there sat the letter and testing requirements for first degree black belt, along with the testing form I would have to turn in and pay for.

So I just said goodbye to a paycheck and a half paying for this test. It was worth it, though.

As you can probably tell, I'm bloody thrilled and am trying to go for any and all regular classes just to make sure that I can't possibly get stuff wrong during this test. That brick is going DOWN.

School is going all right, just slow (as I say every time, but it's true). Right now my literature unit is focused on death and mortality... Wow, that's cheerful.

Bible Bowl tomorrow. I wouldn't mind quite as much if certain people weren't showing up... I won't (and can't) go into details, but understand that it's difficult for me to coexist peacefully with these people after all the crap that they've tried to pull and the sullying of our reputations they are attempting (and in most cases failing) to do. I know that revenge is no way to exist, but honestly it sucks when the evildoers and troublemakers among us don't get their just desserts. As it were, however, I just try not to pay them the attention they so desire. They don't deserve it. Grr.

Right... Nothing much else has been happening around my neck of the woods. I'll see you folks when I see you. :]

Current Mood: Peeved

Random Useless Fact of the Day: Today's winner of the "EEEEUUUU!!! Gross!!" Award goes to Tilbury Docks in London, after finding over 300 kilos of decapitated rates in a shipment of synthetic hair. Apparently the rats had been smuggles in from Ghana, where smoked rat (kebabs?) are a considered a delicacy.

Iiiick.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Internets is a Meaneyhead

My broadband is being slow for some reason. Rawr.

So I finally made Google take (and keep!) my password, so hopefully that means I can update here a bit more often than I do (I'm sure Charlie will be thrilled).

So it's cold here, or at least colder than I enjoy it being. I mean, I don't mind cold, but if all my hoodies are in the laundry that really makes things a bit more intolerable. It's windy, so I can't turn on the fireplace. Hmmm, there's always the electric heater. And the dogs, one of which is attempting to bury her nose under my laptop once again. I don't know why she enjoys that, but she does. The puppy is just weird.

I just now realized that this thing types on a delay. So right now I'm typing what I normally would, but the processor is actually a few words behind me. It looks like there's a ghost using my computer as soon as I stop typing.

So my Christmas was good, albeit somewhat tardy as my brothers went to their respective in-laws for the holiday itself. So my immediate family waited patiently to open gifts until the 26th. It was a nice Christmas, seeing as on the 25th we all sat around in our pajamas and watched movies all day. Yes, I do mean ALL DAY. I think we watched somewhere around five or six movies. We're never going back to Blockbuster, seeing as the Philistines over there keep scratching up or dirtying their discs to the point of their not being playable. Other than that and the dishwasher decided at that moment to decide to die, it was a very enjoyable Christmas. I enjoyed the sleeping in.

You know, since my partial insomnia seems to have cleared up over the past year or so, perhaps I should change my blog address. Any ideas? Do tell.

So I've been camping out by my mailbox since Christmas Eve... Why? Because Christmas Eve was the day I got a notification saying I am being considered for the February black belt test. (Needless to say, I immediately called and/or told everyone that would stand still long enough to listen. I was a happy child.) The last newsletter released said that the final notifications would be sent out this month, but so far pretty much no one's gotten anything. (I don't think they've sent anything out yet.) I'm really hoping I make it. It'd be nice to know for sure so I can start planning a party. I mean, this is definitely a celebrating occasion. :)

Right then, I should probably check on how my uniform is progressing through the laundry.

Behave, kids!

Current Mood: Sleepy

Random Useless Fact of the Day: Bach's "Kafee Kantate," a story about a man who wants his daughter to quit drinking coffee (which the girl refuses), is considered the greatest piece of art written about coffee.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Full Stummy

That's what happens after Thanksgiving: you get full. Right now I find eating to be a difficult thing, seeing as either my stomach feels like it's going to rebel or I simply don't feel hungry. Like, at all. So it'll be a few days before my system is back into swing. I hope yours has had less trouble getting over the gluttony that is America's favorite national holiday. :)

(I say Thanksgiving is America's favorite holiday because if you say "Merry Christmas" anymore you get yelled at for pushing your Christianity on other people, which is so totally un-PC. Scroo dat.)


It's cold. That's fine but a little annoying, because I get a tad depressed in the evenings because it's a pain in the rumpus to regulate my temperature. As long as I don't wear shoes and I keep the hoodie on it's a little easier. But it's still a bit more than is necessary, I think.

Tomorrow will be occupied with tree decorating. I'm dreading this somewhat, as it means I'm going to be kept in the same room for about four hours while I attempt to find just the right place for each of our million billion ornaments. At least we all know where the GOOD ornaments go: Star Wars things go front and center. Garland is wrapped around my neck and upper body while we drape it exactly right. But our tree is fake so we have to set that up before we do anything else, meaning another half hour of straightening out the branches on said fake Christmas tree. Fun times. We attempt to make a runway of our front yard while we set up the outdoor lights (which are actually pretty once we get them all up... It's the getting them up). Really though, it can be fun, at least if I don't have to do it alone. It's a lot better to do with at least my sister; having the brothers around makes it that much more fun, because we start poking around at each other and cramming me in the corner behind the tree, haha.

So Mizzou's playing KS tomorrow. GO TIGERS!!!! DOn't fail us now, or else Mom will be in a bad mood!

Blah. Sleepy now. That and I need to go put my pants in the laundry because this is my last clean pair. I'm sure people would prefer it if I wore pants. I would, too.

Current Mood: Hot and tired

Random useless Fact of the Day: Since it's the day after Thanksgiving... Every year, it's American tradition that the President 'pardon' one turkey from death. Usually, this turkey comes from a petting zoo. Talk about respect for the bird that would've been our national symbol...